Things we are for; what we are about
In an effort to get our 6 readers more aquainted with who we are and what "sweet emotion" is all about, we put together a blog regarding the things we stand against. I'm a little tardy in following up, but here is one more hopefully helpful opportunity to understand just what is the essence of "sweet emotion." Here are the things we encourage/are "for"/are about.
1) SEC football
2) any reference to Hoosiers
3) Manly Men - like Ted Nugent and Bruce Willis
4) Less public women sports
5) Allen Iverson
6) men who have their lives so intertwined with sports that a loss for
you team means a miserable week at work.
7) anyone who is playing against Notre Dame
8) the elimination of female sideline reporters
9)Dads who play their son up an age group so he will get some real experience.
10) Ronnie Lott – lost a pinky and kept playing in the Super Bowl.
11) Sportscenter commercials
12) the ESPN the magazine commercial “I get all my news from espen the magazine.
13) We strongly believe Rocky IV was the real reason the Cold War ended.
14) Fantasy Sports – if you aren’t good enough to play professionally you can at least live out your dreams through them.
15) People who treat video games like real life.
16) people whose enjoyment of Monday and Tuesday is based on your college teams performance on Sunday
17) Sportscasters who refuse to cover Michele Wie everytime she makes another "attempt" to make a cut. (oh wait, no one refuses).
18) We strongly applaud anyone who refused to see Titanic; especially if you abstained because you refused to contribute to it passing Star Wars as the biggest box office hit. *** give yourself a point if you watched it in the theater but with a mouth full of popcorn chuckled as Leo held on at the end.
19) guys who pass the ball to Allen Iverson
20) Brett Farve (not b/c we think he's a great QB, but
b/c he'd play even if his leg fell off)j
21) guys who "walk it off" - we've covered this before and make reference to it sporatically. If you are injured in a game but walk it off and come back---three cheers
22) John Rocker for his taunting of NY
23) Touchdown celebrations - Joe Horn's cell phone antics anyone
24) Hootie Johnson and Augusta National
25) the guy who drove out to The Masters Womans protest just to hold up the sign that said "Iron My Shirt."
26) Alex's friend who ditched mothers day because he had
tickets to the cubs/phillies series in chicago
27) Former President of Harvard University Lawrence Summers (fired for suggesting men were inherently better at some sciences).
28) steak and BBQ
29) Golden Coral (any steak buffet for that matter, where quantity is emphasized over quality
30) We strongly back the proposal of moving Valentine's day to February 29th, therefore only celebrating it once every 4 years.
31) people who refuse to watch TV (and/or) change the channel without the remote. You know the feeling, you sit there and watch "Back to the Future" on TBS for the 90th time because you can't find the remote
32) Snickering at comments like I heard yesterday regarding Michelle Wie "She had a hard time today. While men were able to use short irons on their approach shots, she was having to make up for her shorter drives with long irons."
33) If you play golf, never playing it safe.
34) Trying to get Lifetime and HGTV removed from the standard cable package
A couple of quotes to end things:
-On the one hand, we'll never experience childbirth. On the other hand, we can open all our own jars. ~Bruce Willis, on the difference between men and women
-All men are Mortal. Socrates was mortal. Therefore, all men are Socrates – Woody Allen
-Men are clinging to football on a level we aren't even aware of. For centuries, we ruled everything, and now, in the last ten minutes, there are all these incursions by women. It's our Alamo. ~Tony Kornheiser
Hope this helps a little bit and provided a few laughs for you. Thanks to all our readers and contributors.
posted by Brian @ 11:34 AM
12 comments
12 Comments:
I would like to add that hiker guy who got his arm trapped under a rock and proceeded to CUT IT OFF WITH HIS OWN KNIFE rather than lay there and die. I am for him because I would have sat there and waited to die.
Yes. He is on our list, and there are more out there. Time and space don't permit them all. Maybe this will come in an updated list from time to time. Hopefull this will attract more readers and scare other not wanted ones away.
Brian and I are thinking about putting together a book about "what it means to be a man."
i am for all of that, plus:
in the "walk it off" category, i am for justin harrell. a TORN BICEPS TENDON!
thank you john rocker. thank you.
i am for the glorious sport of flag football, and everyone being an eligible receiver.
Tiger. (anyone watching fatty p's ryder cup implosion this morning?)
the movement to prevent any comparisons to michael jordan. ever.
Ravishing Rick Rude and the Ultimate Warrior.
SEC women. (at least the top 10%)
grizzly man (if you haven't seen it, rent it)
Brian,
I was going to call you last night but obviously didn’t. Very poor on my part.
I have some thoughts in response to your previous post. Of course I believe that the Bible is the sole, infallible Word of God but a Mormon and Muslim probably wouldn’t. They assume what you assume. Also, affirmation is based upon authority, but we need experience and evidence of one’s authority to validate their authority. You went to your dad (higher authority) because you had previous experience on which to base his authority. He may have told you that he was the Larry Bird of Jackson, but you weren’t going to believe him without some experiential evidence affirming his claim. The Bible is based upon experiential authority. When writing the Pentateuch, Moses didn’t assume that the Israelites would accept the authority of God based strictly upon a list of laws. Nor did Jesus perform miracles because He could. The Creation account, the Exodus and the healing of the blind were done and recorded to establish the singular authority of God. Jesus’ miracles not only affirmed the authority of God’s word but also affirmed His own divine authority. Ultimately it is “because the Bible say so” but this may be a difficult starting point for some. . . I wish I had something funny to add right here__.
Trae
Brian,
Check out www.manlaws.com . I'm sure you have seen the commercials but you need to watch the ones that you havent seen and especially read the bios of the men of the square table. The guy that cut his arm off is on there and a bunch of other manly men. You can also check out some of the man laws that are pretty sweet. Some good examples are:
- Man law: Other than riding in a taxi, a man may never be seen in a yellow car.
- Man law: A man must have a firm and defendable stance on the designated hitter rule.
- Man law: An arm rest belongs to the first arm to claim it.
And last but not least:
- Man law: A perfectly beautiful day is a perfectly acceptable reason to be inside watching sports.
I think there should be a man law that forbids visitors to one's home from taking one's seat during a football game. You know the drill: you get up to get another beer, or another brat, and when you come back the friend of your roommate that's sponging off your High Def Sunday Ticket Superfan package - not to mention food and beer - comes back from the bathroom and sat in the spot that you have occupied all afternoon. Not cool.
There should be a man law that allows anyone to make a citizen's arrest and punishment of people who drive stupidly. If a person doesn't signal their turn, which subsequently causes you to pause and miss a chance to make your turn, you should be allowed to chase them down and punish them in some way for inconveniencing other drivers with their poor driving. If you're turning into your driveway, having given adequate signal that you would do so, and a person doesn't slow down at all but rather zooms by at 65 mph just inches from your bumper while flipping you off and laying on the horn, you should be allowed to chase them down and punish them for being a jerk that endangers everyone on the road. Those sorts of situations...
Charles
as far as "the bible is the word of God"...scripture is NOT based on experiential authority. You are confusing the Redemptive-historical function of the Messiah with 18th century emperical philosophy. An appeal to emperical authority is an appeal to one's own experience and is then an ultimate appeal to your rational understanding of that experience. The issue is much more with the possibility of knowledge and the appeal to one's own pressuposition. You are separating the ethical from the intellectual...can't be done.
Charles....brilliant man law, I concurr. It's even worse when someone comes into your home and tries to control the remote control, though i'm tempted to do that all the time
strong but very positive language in there friends.
as much as i hate the guy, i must add chris simms to the "walk it off category." ruptured his freaking spleen, and then came back to lead a td drive to put his team ahead. so much for him being a pansy.
as for the visitor controlling the remote, being a seasoned vet with the controller, i usually operate by the three strikes and you're out rule. if they mess up three times, i get the remote. a very grevious error can count as two strikes sometimes. this system ensures that the television is properly controlled, and if i take the remote, it offers the host an opportunity to further his sanctification in the area of humility
As a Texas fan and a true Texan, allow me to reaffirm this fact: CHRISTIE SIMS IS A PANSY. That bastard.
Alex - Next time you touch my remote I am going to break your arm off.
How about the Manly grit of Sean Peyton. Any first-time head coach who can get the Saints to 3-0 playing that well is amazing.
Ditto on ending any comparisons to his Airness.
www.myspace.com/thelexingtonbrothers
Listen to the songs; thank me later.
Charles
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