one flew over the cuckoo's nest

Al Gore claimed to have invented the internet. Dr Evil claimed that his father invented the question mark. George Costanza claimed to have "artistic integrity". Sheryl Crow claimed we can slow down global warming by whiping with one sheet of toilet paper. And now, Lou Holtz has claimed that Notre Dame is a top ten team with real BCS potential. Holtz doesn't need counseling or anything like that, he needs a whole team of doctors. like at the university level, classes need to be dedicated to studying and analyzing the words that come out of his mouth. Somebody could write a valuable disertation on the outrageous claims of Lou Holtz and their meaning. Let's compile all of his recent statements that deserve a double take (that would include most of them). Please list any outrageous claims worth noting, especially one's by the old raisin behind the ESPN desk.